Sunday, November 01, 2009

The woman loves caulk!


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I’m just as sick of writing about political stuff, and I know you’re tired of reading it, so I’ll tell you about other stuff. This makes the column an official “blog,” because I’m talking about me and my feelings.

Which is a hard cry from the norm, because my co-workers are so self centered it drives me insane. Take Jerome for example, last Friday it was all about him.

“Help ME, I fell down the stairs. I think MY foot is broke. Call an ambulance for ME. It was like that all day, me, me, me.

Well what about my feelings, Jerome? What about my foot?

Speakin’ of my feelin’s. I’m a little disappointed the traffic at the Weirdcrap.com & MyStrangeStories.com is low. It’s about a third of what it was about six years ago…I don’t really know why, but if you know someone who likes to write fiction, give ‘em our number and they can post it.

Let me change that. If you know someone, tell them to visit the site. I’ll just leave it at that. To help with the traffic, I’m dedicating myself to updating the site a little for each holiday. We’ll see what happens.

Speaking of winter, I decided to take a day off work and insulate the windows a bit. I bought some window insulating stuff, but over the years I noticed that the plastic stuff’s seal breaks and a cool breeze comes in. So on my day off, I noticed cracks in the woodwork around the window. I ran my hand around the cracks and that was the culprit of the winter cold.

I bought some clear caulking and proceeded to caulk around the girls room and the kitchen. It was a cool day for October, but the difference was significant. At that point the phone rang. It was the ol’ lady calling from work.

“Hey stranger, how’s it going?”

[I explain that I didn’t do as many chores as planned.]

“That’s fine, I’m happy with whatever you can do.”

[I described my messy caulking job.]

“Don’t worry, we can be as messy as you want as long as the job gets done.

[I tell her I might go to Walmart instead of Lowes for more caulk.]

“To tell the truth, I don’t think it matters where the caulk comes from, as long as the job get done.”

[I ask her opinion on going somewhere where they might have a cheaper brand.]

“Like I said, it doesn’t matter where the caulk comes from as long as there’s enough, you can never have too much caulk. In fact I’m glad you decided to do that, I’m with you 100%. I love caulk! THE MORE CAULK THE BETTER!”

[I explain I better get going because I did half a window and I need to add the new caulk before the old caulk dries out.]

“It’s a good idea to switch caulk before everything dries out. Then you’d have to start all over again.”

I did get those windows fixed up, but ever since I finished, several guys from my wife’s work have been calling several times a day offering us extra caulk if we need it. I explain the jobs done, but thanks.

It’s really nice that so many people are concerned about our homes fuel efficiency!


COMING NEXT: Puke on the wall, what’s up with that?

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