Monday, July 31, 2006

Poor baby

Since we have a newborn, it's hard to write about anything else. For those who just found this blog, here at TheWeirdcrap we've been jotting down our nonsense for the last five or six years. Check out the archived blogs, you'll never know what you'll find.

Baby gurl II is tickled pink when I hold her and talk to her, but her patience with me only lasts about 20 minutes. She starts getting jittery and even if she's not hungry starts acting like she's starving and needs her mom (she's breast feed). As soon as the ol' lady takes her, she stops screaming and all is well. This is the theory I've devised for her behavior.

First she's like, "Hey, its Dad!" "Horray! Hi Dad! Look what I can do. Blah, blah, blah. See? I'm talking too! Blah, blah, goobity-goo!" And it goes on for about 15 minutes.

Then she leans toward my shoulder and starts sucking on it. "Hey, you can't feed me! There's nothing here! How do I eat? What if I get hungry? What do I do if I get hungary! Mom! Mom! Help, I need Mom...bwaaaahhh Bwaaaahhhhh-ha-haaaaa!

And that's how it goes.

Speaking of suffering children, I was really surprised that Israel has shown some restraint during its military campaign. I thought given the oportunity, they'd be bombing daycares as policy. The recent killing of innocent children may have been the act of a few bad apples in control of air strikes. I hope they look into it and prosecute, because bombing civilian targets is not cool.

They say they went to war over a couple of kidnapped soldiers; however, if memory serves me correct. In the last year they kidnapped a few folks from Lebanon themselves. They call it capturing terrorists, but when push comes to shove, they entered foriegn soil and took folks. That sounds like kidnapping to me.

Seems like Hezbollah could have reacted long ago by dropping bombs, but instead they kidnapped right back. An eye for an eye type of thing. Then Isreal reacted with air strikes and say Hezbollah started it. Seems to me Israel started it. So nanny-nanny, get no support from me.

Furthermore, although the definitions get foggy, it doesn't really seem to me Hezbollah isn't a terrorist group in the traditional sense. Terrorists usually go to other countries and cause mayhem, but previous actions of Hezbollah takes place on their own land. Furthermore, a large portion of their funding goes to social programs not provided by the Lebanese government. So they're kind of like a government within the government. A government with large population support. This will be hard to fight against.

I think the solution is a buffer zone manned by a UN military force with the primary objective of keeping checks and balances on Israel. I think their hatred toward Lebanon is too great to be trusted. But the US can't go because Hezbollah attacked us in the 80's, so who are we to protect them?

The buffer zone needs to be manned by big, angry, Arians. I think an army filled with Germans is the only thing that will keep Israel at bay. They know a few Nazi's will end up in the zone, and I think that's one picnic they won't want to attend. If they are equiped with the latest equipment, they should be able to take out Lebanese missles without killing the kids. Plus, it would be difficult to argue that German's are favoring Jews. I'm sorry, but that's just the way it is.

That's my solution, American money and Nazi's. If it's effective and treats both sides equally, it should prevent other middle east countries from joining the party and making a big ol' international war.

And now you know.

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